I Went Home Yay!

Hey guys. 
Long time no chat. 

The last few months has been odd for me. I was home for the whole month of December! It was nice to see my people again but I was also hiding under an awkward stress cloud. I struggle to embrace the concept of being funemployed. 
Then BAM! I found one a job. It was in Seoul. I now live in Seoul. 
I live in a place called Gangnam. My building has two or three plastic surgery clinics in it. Yesterday, I thought about going outside to buy soy milk, but then I saw what kind of pants I was wearing. Had I been anywhere else in the world, I may have gone in track-pants. Hell, I may have even gone in NO pants. (Assuming pants-off Friday.) But when in Gangnam...
The last few months has led me to reevaluate my life a little bit, because I have been rather poor. 
From now on I will lead a more stingy life and regularly look at pie graphs. I hope I am still a fun person.  
I've taken to working on many side-projects. The thing is, I have so many side-projects but so little time, and I am real excited about all of them all that I feel a little spastic. I'm almost thinking about trying a weird sleep cycle again. I wrote a little about this here. PLAY LIFE, guys. Do science with yourself. I dare you. 

Here are some things that happened at home: 

• I went to the supermarket that I used to work at in hope that I would see a few people who used to work there 9 years ago. I do this so I can see that I have progressed more than them. Two of them were still there.
• When I remind myself that I'm unemployed, I remember that I'm a judgmental, jobless bitch. 
• But I did need to go to the supermarket. 
• Every time I see my parents I swear that they know how to use the internetz even less than they did the time before. 
• My mother has awful calendars in at least three rooms of the house. They all have terrible pictures. Example: Cats looking curiously at Christmas trees. Another example: Poor people in India. 
• What I don't get is that my mother isn't even THAT old. Don't have you have to be over 60 to put a calendar on the toilet door? 
• I saw some people I like. One of my friends made me walk too much (I hate walking. It's so unproductive. It's neither good exercise, nor a speedy way to get places), but I still like her so I guess that means a lot.
• I made chocolate mousse from smooshed avocados and tofu. Father ate it and said it tasted good. Then BAM! I told him what it was made out of. Boy, did I show him! If there's one thing I enjoy in life, it's surprising people with nutrients. 
• For the first time, I came home to no animals. I didn't like that. I like all the animals, ever. Except some cats are shit, and birds and horses are a bit scary too.  
• Nek minnit, Dad gets a cat. It's scared AND friendly.
• Nothing so interesting happened at home. 

Other thoughts from me this week recently: 

• One of my friends was quite late this one time. She blamed it on Tater Tots. They were cooking. She wanted to eat them. Now, I hate tardiness. I looothe it. But then I thought, if there is a valid excuse for being late, Tater Tots is it. Then, you can call them Later Tots. 
• I have this thing that I really wanna do. Basically, I wanna know would feel like to be a dinosaur or reptile and be born. So I want someone to make an egg for me and have it be the same relative strength where it is just as tough for me to break out of as it is for a new-born reptile. I guess it can be sticky and gross if you want...I just wanna see what it's like. If anyone knows anyone who can make this happen...
• Would you rather be a Planeteer with an actual power, or be Ma-Ti because he has a spider monkey? 

Watch this video I chose for you:

Thanks for reading about me

Liz Tritops

xoxo

My 100 Favorite Things - Part II

Hey you!

Here are some more things which I like. It's a continuation of this list. 

29. Watching animals stretch. Check out this little guy. Is he even a dog? 
30. Handheld transceivers. Tin can telephones - also fun.  
31. Pachyderms. I think they're pretty special. You look at them and think 'you're just a big grey blob'. True... but there's nothing else quite like them.
32. Streakers at sport. Surprise nudity is almost always excellent. 
33. Seeing angry people in the rain.
34. Avocado. I hadn't even tried avocado until I was 15 or something. I've got 15 years of avocado eating to catch up on. 
35. SOMEONE BUILD ME A TREEHOUSE BECAUSE I WANT ONE.  
36. When you eat something that's so spicy and it hurts heaps and you have to chug milk and then you know everything's going to be okay because you don't die.
37. Squirtle. It's a turtle that can squirt. Very clever. 
38. Home Alone and Home Alone 2: Lost in New York. But NOT Home Alone 3 or Home Alone 4: Taking Back the House. I won't lie to you and tell you that I have seen the fourth installment. I'm sure it's equally as offensive as Home Alone 3. 
39. Vodka.
40. Being inside a sleeping bag inside a tent inside a room (with vodka is even more excellent. And maybe some other people too because sometimes I like people. (Optional extra.))
41. Crappy Powerpoint presentations which you had to make when you were a kid and your teachers probably thought they were good because they didn't know what technology was and you could spend 10 hours chatting to your friends on MSN Messenger lmao rofl (pl). (pl) was the emoticon for plate. NO LIE. Why would you ever even send that to anyone‽ 'Oh hey Tom! Here have a virtual plate! (pl) LOL.'  Meanwhile, back at the Batcave, the rest of the time you played with WordArt and probably made titles that utilised the 'bend' effect and had ALL the colours. You thought they were KEWL. 
42. Getting pudding when you weren't expecting it. (Fruit doesn't count. Unless it's mango. Maybe.) 
43. When a song is sooo much more than 'just a song' because it's a MOTHAFUCKING DUET!!!! I like interaction. Duets are underrated. 
44. Seeing poor children smile. 
45. When you bump into someone that you know from one place but you're both in a different place. And you're all like 'Wow! What the eff are you doing here' and shit gets CRAY-ZEE.
46. Wes Anderson films. I like his colours and the dry humour. And then BAM he makes up a sport which should exist in real life. Whackbat is like the perfect child of cricket and Calvinball.  
47. Calvinball. I wish Calvinball masks were mandatory in day-to-day activities. 
48. Troy and Abed. I want Troy to marry me and I want Abed to be my friend. PLEASE. PICK ME PICK ME. 
49. Piñatas. You're blind, you try and hit something with a stick, people laugh at you, you try and hit something with stick again, you maybe break it, you get lots of lollies. Great progression. Simple, but effective. 
50. When you're driving through an intersection and you sneeze and you don't die. 
51. When I brush my teeth, floss my teeth, and do the mouthwash-thing all in the same oral hygiene session. It's like an oral hygiene orgasm.
52. Highland cattle. They're so ridiculous looking. 
53. Wearing a sports uniform because I'm in a team and I like sport. 
54. When I bake a cake that looks good AND tastes good. 
55. Super-muscly children from former Soviet countries. I don't really know if they exist very often, but I like to think they do. 

Here are some children. They are poor but still smiling! 

Smiling Bolivian Children

Smiling Thai Child

In other news:

This week a teenager said to me: "You must like Eminem because you have a really good vocabulary." Wow. Fairplay, kid. 

I am in Auckland today. I have an important interview for my Visa to let me work in the USA tomorrow so I'm a little nervous! I hope they're not cunts about the process. 
I also get to see some people who I think are okay, and it's much warmer here. 




I should sleep now. BYE!